11:55 am PST

There are many times when I’d rather be alone than around someone who has bad intensions. The people with whom you choose to surround yourself play an important role in your life. Sometimes you can’t choose the types of people you encounter, but is up to you to choose who remains, who you take as an example, and who you let go of.

Eventually you should surround yourself with people who help you become a better person and let go of those who prevent you from doing this. When you’re with someone, remember the points below and see if he has bad intensions:

1. They make time for you only when they need it

Avoid wasting your time with someone who wants to be with you only when he is in “the mood”. You should not force someone to make time for you because if he really cares, he’ll be happy to spend time with you.

It can be very difficult when you’re with someone who overlooks the value that you bring into the relationship. Unfortunately, the other person is the only one who has something to loose and, through this way of behaving, he only demonstrates stupidity and not loyalty. So avoid asking someone for attention. Seek to know yourself well and realize that there are times when it is better to move on.

2. They keep you anchored in the past

Some people simply refuse to accept that you’re not the same person you once were, that you realized you’ve maded some mistakes in the past, that you’ve learned from them and left them in the past, where they should be. They might not accept the fact that you’re growing and moving forward in life and might try to anchor you in the past so they can keep up with you. Don’t approve this kind of behavior after you recognize it. Keep moving forward.

The best thing about the past is that it’s over. To keep living in the pas is a waste of energy and does not help at all to make your day better. If someone judges you by what you did in the past, you might need to fix your future by letting that person be a part of your past.

3. You feel suffocated

A healthy relationship is like a home where doors and windows are always wide open. There is a lot of fresh air in the house and no one feels suffocated inside. A relationship flourishes naturally in an open environment like this. You can come and go whenever you want. However, you choose to stay, because where you are now is exactly where you want to be.

If you want to be part of someone’s life, no matter how many doors or windows are open, you will not want to leave. If someone has closed all of them trying to force you to stay in a relationship which you do not want to be part of, perhaps it’s time to “break the doors” and leave.

4. They make you feel bad about your aspirations and skills

If you let others define your aspirations and skills, then you’re letting them drag you down. What you are able to obtain is not the same thing with what other people think that you could do. What you can get depends on what you choose to do with your time and energy.

I noticed that there is a custom among people to throw around all sorts of assumptions about what others can and cannot do. Seek to look beyond all these assumptions and mental limitations that other people have, and turn your attention toward what you want to become in life.

So avoid worrying about what others think. Choose what you consider must be done and do it. The only ones who will be mad at you for doing this are those who want you to live a lie.

5. Their negativity affects you

The negative people in your life do not behave like this only with you, but with everyone around them. What they say and do is a projection of their own reality, their own problems. Even if they say something that seems personal, talking badly to you in a direct way, most likely it has nothing to do with you.

It is important to remember this because although you have no control over what these people do and say, it depends on you if you let these things affect you.

Positive things can happen when you keep a certain distance from negative people. Doing this does not mean that you hold a grudge, it simply means that you respect yourself.

6. They are very jealous of what you have

Excessive envy does not show how much a person admires you, but tells you how much they don’t like themselves. You can try to help them to observe things differently but be careful, because they might drag you down. Most times, no matter how much you show you love them, it will never be enough to change their opinion about themselves. They must take care of their own healing process . After all, happiness is something that comes from within.

7. They want to turn you into someone else

Spend time with people who see you as you are, and not like what they want you to be or what  they think you should be. Spend even more time with people who really know and respect you, who care about you exactly as you are.

If anyone expects you to be someone else, then take a step back. It is wiser to leave a relationship being who you are, than to keep the relationship intact and to act like someone else. It is easier to heal after a little suffering and meet someone else than trying to keep that inner struggle between what you are and what others want you to be.


What would you add to this list? What would be a clear indicator that you’re around people that have bad intensions? Please leave a comment below.